"Why am I not good enough?"

I believe that there's quite a lot of teenage girls are suffering in Atelphobia, asking themselves the same questions again and again. "Why am I not good enough?", "why am I not pretty like others?", "why am I different from the girls in my school?". I believe that these questions are spinning in almost 90% of the teenage girls' head nowadays, which gave me an idea of this topic. 

Of course, I've been through all these either, I kept cutting myself and blame myself that why am I not as good as others, why am I not as pretty as others, why am I not as perfect as others. All these questions are spinning in my head through midnight, morning, school time, whenever I see girls outside I just can't stop myself of thinking about all those. I hide scars on my hands everyday in school, in home, just to avoid people watching me with different, weird, eyesight.

And one day, I stopped thinking those, I started to think that I should stop, I should just stop thinking those before the cuts go deeper and deeper. I want to stop the scars on my hands, I want to stop myself from thinking all those nonsense in my head. And after 1 month, I can finally wear dresses I like, show them the "brand new" me. All I wanted to say is, there's always beauty in every girl, the "outside" doesn't really matters, the only thing that matters is the inner beauty of you. No matter how pretty you are, without any courtesy, your outer beauty doesn't mean anything at all. You don't have to be pretty to live your life right? There's always different paths for us, if life is unfair to everyone, doesn't that make life fair? 

☮chayanne☮